Gay marriage? So?

Since election time is rolling closer and closer in the States (sigh-I'll miss Dubbya. He's done great things for the Canadian dollar.) and most likely here in Canada as well, let's talk about something that's sure to be a hot election topic, shall we? Say it with me kids, gay marriage.

As a heterosexual male (*looks down pants* yep, male), and as a person who was brutalized by his mother (not all women are caring and nurturing), let me start by saying if 2 men or 2 women want to get married, by all means, go ahead. I have always held to the personal belief that the world is a hard enough place to be happy in to worry about what gender somebody is happy with. And so long as there is love in your hearts and you have kindness and compassion-adopt! Adopt as many kids as you can. Personally I would have much rather been raised by a gay couple that wanted me than a straight woman who didn't. So for all of those who believe that homosexuality is an affront to God-get bent!

Really. Gay marriage is not going to cause the collapse of Western Civilization. It is not going to destroy the institution of marriage. I'm fairly certain that there will be a far lower divorce rate among gay couples than straight ones.

Is it just me or has anyone else noticed that most of the people who are really, really outspokenly against gay marriage tend to get outed a couple of months later? So, you know, if you're gay and you're looking, find yourself an outspoken opponent of gay marriage and you might get a date! Of course, they won't call you back and they'll denounce you as evil, but it could still be a good night. (kidding! relax folks!)

And for the overly religious zealot types, here's the thing: if God has a problem with gay marriage, let God stop it. Not by vote in congress or Parliament, but by showing up and saying "Knock this shit off!". Doesn't have to be in person-could be by flaming shrub or whatever. I'm pretty sure that he has the special effects budget to animate a statue of jeebus if he wanted to.

Hey, is it getting warm in here? Does anyone smell burning wood?

(If the Christians are right, I'm so going to Hell...)